


Smooth

by ChariKard



Category: Far Cry 3
Genre: I only wrote this cuz I have no self control, M/M, a far cry 3 fanfic?, im not sorry, in 2019?, including the F slur, its more likely than you think, no need to go crazy with that one, only once though, tons of swearing as youd expect
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-23
Updated: 2019-04-23
Packaged: 2020-01-24 07:49:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,555
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18567040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChariKard/pseuds/ChariKard
Summary: Vaas does an impromptu sing and dance routine to that one Santana song. Jason doesn't know how to feel about it.





	Smooth

**Author's Note:**

> Sometimes you just gotta give in and write something that is 100% self-indulgent and share it for the entire internet to enjoy. 
> 
> I will not take constructive criticism for this. It doesn't need it. It is flawless

* * *

 

Jason was used to being captured. He was no stranger to a kidnapping. The only reason he was familiar was the fact that he consistently escaped and his captor, Vaas was as persistent as he was.

In the end, each imprisoning attempt was similar to the ones before it. Jason was knocked unconscious, he was brought to a secure location, usually tied down, monologued at for a few minutes, and then he would make his escape. It was a pattern he had down to a tee. He was certain Vaas would never divert from it out of pure spite. But Jason was wrong.

It started out the same as always. He was knocked out, dragged to a secure location, and tied down, but that’s where the similarities begin to lessen. He opened his eyes to see he was in a dimly lit room, the only light source being a ceiling lamp. He was sitting in an uncomfortable wooden chair, hands tied behind him, placed directly in front of a splintering table. At the other end was the familiar scarred face of Vaas. He paced by a doorway while one of his pirate lackeys stood inside it, assault rifle in hand and bandana wrapped around his face.

The moment Vaas noticed Jason stirring, he smiled and stepped towards his captive. “How you doing Snow White?” he grumbled. “You enjoying yourself? You like tearing shit up that doesn’t belong to you?”

Jason knew where this was going. It was the start of a typical Vaas speech about how angry he was. The best thing to do was play along, but Jason liked having a bit of fun at the pirate’s expense. He scowled at Vaas, giving him an answer that he knew would be unsatisfactory. “What if I do?”

Vaas clicked his tongue. “That’s not an answer, but I’ll let it slide this time because I’m a forgiving person. That’s why you’re here actually.” Jason furrowed his brow. The word ‘forgiving’ did not describe Vaas in the slightest. What could he possibly have planned this time? He walked across the room at a leisurely pace as he spoke. “See, I wanted to change things up a bit. I was getting tired of chasing you across this piece of shit island, so I want to give you a choice. I’ll forgive all the stupid shit you’ve done, all the murders, the stealing, the fucking of my sister, and, most importantly the angering of me, as long as you put yourself to use. For me of course.”

Jason was almost offended by the insinuation that he would drop all he’s worked for to join sides with Vaas. He steeled his expression as he responded. “What makes you think I’d ever join you?”

Vaas nodded at this, seemingly expecting that specific question to arise. He maneuvered to one of the ends of the table and leaned on the tabletop.“Well, I’m glad you asked. See, we’re a lot alike you and me. You like blowing shit up, I like blowing shit up. You like shooting guns, I like shooting guns. You like pissing me off, I like pissing you off. The only difference is that you got your brains fucked up thanks to my little sister. You think you’re the chosen one, the white boy who's gonna save the brown people from some fucker with a gun, an army, and a shit ton of drugs. But you know what? You’re not. You’re just some pussy who couldn’t handle his shit. You had to go and find yourself, fuck around with the natives in the jungle, get some shitty tattoos, all because you couldn’t handle it alone.”

Jason could see the malice in Vaas eye. They burned into him a feeling of resentment he always had hidden away. They were the eye of the man responsible for killing Grant, the man responsible for kidnapping his friends, the man responsible for so much destruction. Yet he dared to act as if he knew who Jason truly was. It was almost laughable. But Jason wasn’t in the mood to laugh. “You don’t know who I am,” he growled, his contempt manifesting in his voice.

Vaas wasn’t bothered by Jason’s intensity. He brushed it off and continued his diatribe. “That’s where you’re wrong, hermano. I know exactly who you are. Because you’re me. I did everything you did, the only difference is I know these tattoos don’t do shit. The sooner you realize we’re the same-“

Jason had heard enough. Vaas could think the two were alike but it didn’t make it true. Vaas did things for his own personal gain, Jason did everything he had to in order to save his friends. To Jason, Vaas was nothing but delusional, and he made that clear when he interrupted him. “You’re fucking crazy”

“Oh, you’re calling me crazy? Vaas crouched over Jason, staring him in the face as he insulted him, “Look at you! Your face is fucked, you smell like shit, and you’ve killed more people than I have. I know I’m fucking crazy, but you should look in a mirror.”

Jason was furious. He wished he could throttle the Pirate for the way he described him, for comparing the two of them. Unfortunately, his hands were still tied down, making that an impossibility. But his mouth wasn’t. He looked at Vaas’ tanned and scratched face, anger boiling inside as the two of them had an impromptu staring contest. Eventually, Jason couldn’t handle it. He spat in Vaas’ face, landing a direct hit under his eye. “Fuck. You.” He insulted as Vaas stood up, and cleared the saliva.

He wiped his hand dry on his tank top, teasing Jason as he did so. “You’re into that kinky shit huh Jason? Then you should now that I don’t like it when people do things without my consent.” With almost impossibly fast movement, Vaas thrust his hand forward, gripping Jason’s neck and squeezing. “It makes me angry,” he said, tightening his hold on his captive’s windpipe.

Jason could feel his throat constrict, his airflow stimmy. But he knew Vaas wouldn’t kill him now. It would be too easy. As his hand continued pressing down in his trachea, Jason decided to have his own fun. He forced a smile, “What, no foreplay?”

Vaas, as predictable as ever, loosened his grip. “Oh, you want foreplay? I’ll give you fucking foreplay.” As he removed his hand, he yelled at the other pirate in the room. “Hey! You have a radio?”

The subordinate was blindsided by the request, his quivering voice evidence of this. “Uh...no? I have an iPod though.”

“That’s good enough. Give it.” Vaas stuck his hand out as his lackey dropped his so-called iPod in it. The mohawked pirate examines the device, only to roll his eyes and grumbled an insult at the other pirate. “This isn’t a fucking iPod, you dumbfuck, it’s some shit MP3 player. Where the fuck did you even get this.”

“I got it from-“ he began to answer but was cut short by Vaas.

“That was a rhetorical question. You know what that is?”

“Um...no.”

Vaas plastered a fake smile, which was followed by more insults being thrown at the pirate. “Its a question that doesn’t need a fucking answer. Now shut up. Me and Jason are gonna have some fun.” With a swift press of a button, the MP3 player blasted out a song, one Jason was vaguely familiar with. As the Latin musical intro played, Vaas playfully shimmied in Jason’s field of view. When the lyrics kicked in, it became clear that Vaas knew the song by heart. His voice overlapped that of the performer, like impromptu karaoke.

 

_ Man, it’s a hot one _

_ Like seven inches from the midday sun _

_ Well, I hear you whisper and the words melt everyone _

_ But you stay cool _

 

Vaas’ singing voice was far from grating on the ears. In fact, Jason found it fitting and enjoyed it quite a bit. Though nothing could erase the terrible things Vaas had done, something about seeing him sing was disarming. Jason didn’t appreciate being disarmed in any sense of the word. “You think Santana’s gonna make me budge?” he said as Vaas stepped closer to his seated frame. With an outstretched hand, he lifted Jason’s chin while the second verse kicked in.

 

_ My muñequita _

_ My Spanish Harlem Mona Lisa _

_ You’re my reason for reason _

_ The step in my groove, yeah _

 

Vaas continued to dance to the beat, occasionally glancing at Jason, to gauge his reaction no doubt. The California native kept his reactions entirely internal, though the longer the show went on the harder it was to contain. Something about the way Vaas moved was...alluring. As much as he’d prefer not to use that word to describe the pirate, it didn’t change the fact that it was the truth. Maybe it was just his overactive mind messing with him, maybe it was the lack of fresh air in the room, maybe Vaas’ dancing and singing activated a part of Jason’s brain that had long since been closed off. The reason was unknown, and Jason had no way of stopping it. Instead, he resigned himself to watch and indulge his underlying desires, at least to see what was really there.

 

_ And it’s just like the ocean under the moon _

_ Well, that’s the same as the emotion that I get from you _

_ You got the kind of loving that can be so smooth, yeah _

_ Gimme your heart, make it real _

_ Or else forget about it _

 

Vaas posed at the chorus’ end, smirking at Jason as if he knew what he was thinking. the song continued, but just as Vaas was about to start his singing again, the second pirate in the room interrupted. “Uh, boss...?”

Vaas sighed, loosening his stance and glaring at his subordinate. “What the fuck is it? Can't you see I’m in the middle of something?” he gestured towards Jason who wouldn’t dare admit he was disappointed in the turn of events.

“It’s about that actually,” the pirate mumbled. “Doesn’t this seem a little...gay?”

Vaas crosses his arms and scowled deeper. “What did you just say to me? Did you just call me a faggot?”

The pirate raised one of his hands to try and reduce the hostility of the situation. “N-no, not at all!” he stumbled. “It’s just...the singing. It seems-“

Vaas interjected before anything more could be said. “Since when was singing something only gay people can do, huh? You have something against singing?”

“No it was just...the song...you know?” The lackey tried his best to explain himself, but nothing he said worked in his favor.

“Oh, so you’re calling Carlos Santana gay?” Vaas presupposed. “One of the greatest guitarists of all time? Are you trying to start shit with me on purpose?”

“No, but...” The pirate knew when he was in a fight he could not win. He turned away from Vaas and apologized before the argument got out of hand. “I’m sorry boss. I’ll drop it. Keep going.”

“Well, I can't now. You ruined the mood. Now I’m all self-conscious and shit. Once we get out of here I’m assigning you to be my footrest to make up for the embarrassment you put me through.”

“But-“

“No buts!” Vaas boomed. “If you didn’t want to be punished then you shouldn’t have insulted Santana.” He inhales sharply and returned his attention to his captive. “Sorry about that Jason. Sometimes the help can be too fucking mouthy.” Jason didn’t respond, partly out of resentment and partly due to his mind still reeling from thoughts he'd rather not have. Vaas didn’t react, taking his silence as whatever answer he needed. “You like Santana right? I mean, you’re a white boy from California so your music taste is probably shit, but that doesn’t mean you don’t have some taste, right?”

“I preferred your rendition over the original.” The words escaped his lips before he even realized. He wanted to shout at himself, correct his phrasing to hide his thoughts, but he knew anything he did, no matter how subtle, would give everything away. Instead, he froze, keeping his expression as neutral as possible. 

Vaas let out a short chuckle, “Not to brag or anything but I’ve been practicing my singing recently. I guess the fact that you liked it can’t be helped.” The pirate squinted and leaned over the table slightly to eye Jason a bit closer. Being able to see Vaas’ face up close did not help the way he was feeling. He felt as if he was being read like a book. He felt vulnerable, something he almost never felt nowadays.

“You know Jason,” Vaas started, bringing Jason’s attention to current affairs. “If you were to join me, you could see me perform more often. Maybe give you a more private show, eh?” Oh god. If everything he felt could be chalked up to burning anger, the pirate’s last comment made it clear that Jason was feeling something much more complicated. “Something to think about.” 

Jason was going to think about it. he had never felt anything but contempt for Vaas. No other emotion could as accurately describe his inner thoughts. But even so, there was always something that Jason couldn’t keep buried. He enjoyed exploring the island in search of Vaas. He liked finding clues to Vaas’ location. He found the Hunt exciting, to an almost worrying degree. Now, after having experienced a song and dance treatment from his prey, Jason felt...another kind of excitement.

It was odd, considering it was fueled by fury, entertainment, and now lust if that was even the word used to describe his carnal emotion. Unfortunately, he knew acting in this would be met with extreme prejudice. Instead, he had to be content with watching Vaas from a distance and catching him in the near future. As tempting as Vaas’ offer was, there was no way Jason was going to accept. It would take away most, if not all, of his pleasures.

Vaas, tired of leaning, stood up straight, sighing. “But I’ve wasted enough of our time.” He pulled a knife from a sheath around his belt, tossing it onto the table. It clattered in front of Jason as the pirate turned around to face the exit. “Here’s a knife. I’ll leave you to escape like you always do.”

Jason was almost angry that Vaas was letting him go so easily. But at the same time, he expected no different. He knew the pirate was going to let him marinate on the deal he had set whether or not Jason accepted immediately or not. Now, all that was left to do was wait.

As Vaas passed his pirate associate, said associate spoke up about the situation that just occurred. “Boss, you sounded like you were flirting with-“

Vaas groaned as the door shut behind them. Jason couldn’t hear them clearly, but the walls were thin enough that he was able to make out what the two were saying. “Pendejo. I was playing him. You saw the look in his eyes. He wanted me. I was just using my assets to get what I want.”

“Isn’t that still gay?”

“Call me gay one more time and I will skin you alive.”


End file.
